I’ve been listening to Eckhart Tolle on cds titled Living a Life of Inner Peace (New World Library). On Disc One he is addressing the sense of “I” that he holds exists deep within each of us.
“Where,” he asks, “does this very deep sense of ‘I am,’ come from?”
In reverential tones he speaks of this “I” as “something so precious that we don’t want to loose it. In fact to him it is unimaginable that the world could ever be without this sense of ‘I am,’ of ‘being-ness,’ of ‘presence.’”
Tolle sees the problem as that our sense of ongoing-ness gets mixed up with memories, and with mental images accompanied by our “stories.” If, though, we can distill the deeper sense of being from what we tell others and ourselves about our lives, then, from underneath we are supported by the deeper sense of an unchanging, ongoing eternal being.
On Disc Two Tolle guides the listener into a second, equally deep mystery:
“What other thing, apart from your deepest sense of “I am,” is there that never changes in your life, that has always been there?”
His answer is “the present moment.” Listening carefully I hear him repeatedly refer to “the present moment” and to “the now” interchangeably as a “field”—the field of the present moment. Obviously he is not talking about time in the ordinary sense of a flowing sequence of events. A “field” ordinarily, or at least it used to be, thought of as occupying space. Is he talking about the concept of space-time as a fourth dimension?
As my mind is about to go off in the direction of reducing the mystery about which he speaks to something I think I know something about, I am cautioned by his very next words that he is moving into an area where words and even language are inadequate. He warns that when entering the territory of the deep mysteries of life the logical rational mind in its service to egoic thinking will attempt to rationalize away the mystery the words are merely pointing to.
In any event, I am grateful for having been pulled back from the brink. And as soon as I am the idea of the present moment being a Field seems as strangely familiar territory, and where over the nearly five years since Bob’s transition I have become increasingly comfortable in accepting this as where my Beloved and I continue our life and our work together.
In this state of awareness of being eternally one, I think of my beloved as my own Higher Mind. And I recall a friend’s signature quote:
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field, I’ll meet you there. Rumi