From the Bob & Ann Journal Dialogues
Love is Eternal
With angels as one of the earliest subjects of the Journal Dialogues, another prominent theme weaving in and out is the true or eternal nature of love. The entry below bears the heading “Grand Conjunction,” dated May 24, 2006, just a few days over two months from Bob’s transition.
I was at my daughter Anna’s in Paso Robles, still recovering from knee replacement surgery, and out for a walk up 17th Street when I began hearing an Inner Voice. The voice was one familiar to me for as far back as I could remember, and known to me as “Jesus”. It would be a diversion to here tell how as a child I came to know Jesus, but suffice it to say he was a constant, invisible companion all through my childhood, only gradually fading into the background of my life as adolescence approached.
The Inner Voice was now assuring me that I was to receive “my soul’s sincere desire.” I knew this referred to the continuation of my relationship with Bob. The assurance concerned the eternality of our love. The voice was explaining that a “grand conjunction” was to take place, beginning that day and over the next nine months. I counted ahead to February 24th/25th, 2007. And then, for a reason I still cannot explain, I asked: “Jesus, are you to be my initiator?” And immediately the words:
Yes, and as already has been given, you with Bob’s help, will write about this “rebirth”. It could not take place without his agreement to go ahead and safeguard your passage. Your souls will never again know separation. Had you been able—applying everything you knew from human knowledge—to succeed in holding him back, this grand conjunction by which two souls are made one could not take place.
The Inner Voice continued
Let there be no more vain regrets. Instead, giving thanks, call upon me with your every breath, for when you do I am here with you, and where I am your beloved is also.
You will learn to live in two dimensions, two vibratory frequencies at once. This will be gradual and over the next nine months.
I then asked how important it was for me to be at Murray Creek? And the answer came:
You only need be there as you are physically able to, and as guided you will visit and help wherever needed. Have no fear about loneliness. My presence and Bob’s increasingly will be realized. You will not be alone.
I finished my walk and, on returning to my room at Anna’s, recorded the above dialogue with the Inner Voice I had identified as Jesus.
Next I searched my laptop computer for the words “grand conjunction.” But what came up was limited to astrological references. I next expanded my search to include “two souls” and “conjoined”. It was then that numerous references came up to Emanuel Swedenborg, about whom up to this point I knew next to nothing. nor had I ever heard Bob refer to him. A Wikipedia link offered that one aspect of Swedenborg’s writings were on the subject of “Conjugial Love” which, although he had never married, was his last great work, written near the end of his life.
At the time, this recalled for me and from my over forty years of Jungian studies, that Jung’s last great work was titled Mysterium Coniunctionis. Both “last works” were undertaken during their authors’ last seven years of their eighty-four-year lives.
From time to time the subject of Swedenborg would come up in the Journal Dialogues with Bob. Time and again Bob would seem to be urging me to see what else Emanual Swedenborg had written on the subject of eternal love and, coincidentally, on the subject of angels, the two themes seeming very much to go hand-in-hand. A example is this oft quoted passage:
And lo! Instantly there appeared a chariot descending from the highest or third heaven, in which I saw one angel; but as it approached I saw therein two . . . And lo! It was a husband and wife; who said, “We are a conjugial pair.” (C L 42)
It was in this way I learned that Swedenborg, an Eighteenth Century scientist who, around his fifty-sixth year, had became a consummate mystic and one of the most gifted seers the world has known, and who was firmly convinced that the depth of the relationship between a husband and a wife carried over into the Afterlife “in whatever state it was at their death in this world. Thus a couple in true spiritual love remain together in that state in heaven for eternity.” (C L)
I chose to believe the Inner Voice that had promised our two souls were undergoing a process described as a “grand conjunction” by which we were being “conjoined”—made one—never to be separated again. Because I received this from the Inner Voice before ever reading Swedenborg, his writings only confirmed that to which my heart had already borne witness.
And yes, I have questioned whether or not I am delusional, nor do I fault anyone for concluding such. From my earliest memories of myself as an only, lonely child I did hear inner voices and see into worlds no doubt invisible to eyes of my elders. Nor would it surprise me to learn that many or even all children, when they are very young, are natural seers. Wordsworth, as in his Ode to Immortality, clearly believed so.
I suspect the difference between someone who is delusional, or is mystically inclined, or simply intuitionally gifted is not always clearly discernible. All three are more perfectly at home in inner than in the outer worlds. And yet, in my own way, I am a child of the Age of Reason, and easily swayed by what my five outer senses tell me. But I believe also in what my inner senses tell me. For instance, I cannot ever remember not believing that Jesus was an ever-available inner presence. And then, when I was twenty-eight years old, I did experience what I can only describe as a vision—the only genuine, full-blown visionary experience I have ever had. But for me, as I imagine for most, one is enough to last a lifetime.
Obviously, these Journal Dialogues that I am persuaded it is time to begin sharing from will have a limited field of interest, to say nothing about credibility. Still I do so in what I believe to be obedience to the Inner Voice that assures in doing so I have Bob’s help as well as his higher perspective on such matters as “the rebirth of soul” and the present human need for a higher perspective on life here and beyond.